White Boy...!

I was done with my job for the day. It was a damp and cold evening in New York. I and my colleague were waking towards Union Square. I started rolling a cigarette and continued our conversation about life in DC, its upside and down sides in comparison to New York. Then my colleague started talking about why she would take a job there and move with her family and how fascinated she is about all things she could take her children to etc. In the mean time, nodding and hmming in agreement, I had lit my cigarette and took a deep drag to get rid of the cold winds which was finding its way through my jacket slacks. Before I could take the second one I could see this person approaching me in his shabby looking outfit and a pulling cart full of 'things' trailing behind him. From the body language I knew what he is going to do next. But I was already thinking about the last couple pinches of powdery tobacco in my rolling pack.

"Do you have a cigarette?" he asked me. I was feeling rather awkward about offering him that not so good quality of the last pinches of tobacco. I was not so worried about giving but about an act of charity involving not so good quality donation, though he was a homeless man. But the cold had numbed all my senses along with the one which is 'common'. In stead of offering and help him make the choice, I decided (may be not decide.. but just did!!)to walk ahead with a head shake and couple of words, " sorry my bro... ". The worst part was I didn't even offer him eye contact as I was approaching the street crossing. As I was crossing the street I could hear him throw a question at me, in pretty high voice.. " OK... Now you are acting like those white boys Aaanh...!!!

There was a no end to my embarrassment, almost near Union square with lots of people walking around. I turned around at the other side of the street, held my hands out and yelled at the top of voice.. "I am really sorry my brother, I am...!!" I was not sure if he cared for my apologies, as he walked ahead, not looking towards me. I could see the smile flashing on the face of my colleague, and I started to smile too. I was not sure which made me feel bad, the fact that I was recognized to be of one race or his attribution of the other races attitude. Not complicating my life any more, repeating his comment a couple of times to myself, I walked towards the overflowing pedestrian traffic of Union Square Park...